Be Yourself – the oldest cliché in regards to success with women. You ask anyone who is non-community for advice and the most common response you will receive is:  just be yourself.

I have come a long way. And in the beginning after reading The Game I thought this is nonsense. I need to create this new persona. Forget being yourself.

Wrong. Completely wrong. Instead of creating a new you, you need to destroy and shatter the limiting beliefs that have prevented you from being yourself all of your life.

The problem is that a chode is not himself. He really is not. It is harder to be yourself than most people think. Being yourself does not mean doing the same things that you are doing when you are a chode. Heck no! That is why you are not getting the girl. Think about it, the chode is always in his head, attempts to impress girls, and is terrified to lead. These things are not himself.

Let’s first discuss impression versus expression. This is a concept I first saw Alex from RSD write about. If you are attempting to impress a girl you are definitely not yourself. You are trying to create an image that is not you in order for the girl to like you. On the other side, if you are coming from a frame of self-expression, you are yourself. You are you. You do things because that is the way you feel and you are not seeking a reaction. It is you on the purest level. That is why you can buy a girl a drink and not lose value as long as it is coming from that frame of expression.

You do not buy the girl a drink because you want to impress her so you can sleep with her. You buy if for her because that is who you are and what you felt like doing.

Society does not want you to be yourself. They are constantly imposing different rules on you and telling you what is socially acceptable and socially unacceptable. If I did things that were socially acceptable I would still be a chode. Drinking, partying, persisting on the close, walking up to random girls and telling them you want to be with them within a couple of minutes of meeting them, and the community. Are these socially acceptable? I bet you most people would be appalled if they saw any item from that list. But that is me. That is what I enjoy doing. The Heck with the ridiculous rules. That is me on the purest level.

The way it works is like this. You are born. You are you. Then you grow up and people start having an influence on you. Some of the influence is good but a lot of it is negative. A lot of this influence is other people creating limiting beliefs and telling you what you can and cannot do. They tell you that you have to make a good impression. Think about that one. There is something inherently wrong that goes against being yourself with making a good impression. So time goes on and little by little your true self gets covered up and you become terrified of expressing those real desires and urges because of society. You become another case and fall into the majority of the population who does not even enjoy being with their wife. How sad is that? You are a hybrid of limiting beliefs. A simplified robot.

A then you get into the community. A lot of stuff in the community will mess you up. A lot of it is good advice but a lot of it makes you worse. Routines and such are another cover up of your true self. Look at it like this. If you are going to use routines, take Improv class, reiterate a line, or do anything like that, do it for the right reason. Learn how to deliver routines correctly not because you want to impress the girl to be with her but so that you learn how to express yourself better.

Now I want to go from the process of meet to close comparing the natural who knows how to express himself and be himself versus the chode. But for this, you’ll have to wait for next month.

Enjoy,

PrettyBoy