Reasons Why People Get and Stay “Stuck” – The Positive Payoff

Reasons Why People Get and Stay “Stuck” – The Positive Payoff

Why do people stay stuck in spite of a stated desire to change their behaviors to successful ones so they can make progress?  Here are a few reasons I have found when my clients keep getting stuck on the same sticking points.  These reasons apply not just to getting better in their ability to do well with women, but to all kinds of bad habits or unproductive behaviors and beliefs.  Here are a few reasons people stay stuck.

1) Perceived benefits or “payoffs” for not changing. This is when at a subconscious level a person perceives that they have more to gain by staying stuck doing the same behaviors that are ultimately unhealthy and destructive.

Potential “payoffs” include:

  • Getting attention by playing the victim.  They fear a loss of attention from friends, mentors and others will no longer be around to help them if they are not a victim and are successful at achieving their stated goal.  They do not believe that there is an alternative way to meet their emotional needs to be loved and to feel important.  This can actually include reinforcement from other guy friends and wingmen that are stuck.

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Aligning Your True Self With Your Real Desire

The laws of attraction are one of the most powerful tools out there that can be used to bring you that which you truly desire.

What are these laws?

In a simplistic form – whatever you think of, and feel, you communicate to the world, and attract more of it, back into your life.

When I first started meeting some of the people on this forum and in this community, I noticed a considerable difference in results between some guys and others. It wasn’t necessarily their look, or their style, or the words they used. But rather, it was the image that they conveyed and were projecting outwards to the world.

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Welcome to the Leading East Coast Dating and Social Life Mastery Community

We are the largest and most active Dating & Men’s self development forum in the Washington, DC and Baltimore metropolitan area and one of the largest in the world with over 1,600 members. We are dedicated to improving the lives of persons who are looking to enhance their dating lives and master their social skills. We have recently expanded to include a rapidly growing community in Miami, FL as well.

Many of our members found us after reading books like “The Game” by Neil Strauss, a story of a writer who became a rising star and “pickup artist.” The Game documents Neil Strauss’ experience in the seductive and mysterious world of the pickup artist (“PUA”) community. Other members searched for a local “lair” or “forum” where they could find wingmen to go out with and improve their dating and social lives and found us.   However, the Attraction Vault is about more than just “picking up” women.  The Attraction Vault is a community established to help individuals grow as people. 

Who We Are

We are an all volunteer group of primarily men, and some helpful, supportive women mostly in Washington, DC, Baltimore and Miami metropolitan areas who work together to help one another improve our dating and social lives. Members of the Attraction Vault range from working professionals with extensive experience in dating, to young men with little experience in dating and socializing with women. Members also include divorced men in their 30s and 40s that just want to get back into the dating game and single men who are already happy with their dating life, but are seeking constant improvement in their relationships. 

What We Do

Members provide advice and support to each other through a private online discussion forum. The forum posts focus on topics that help individuals develop the dating and social skills required to initiate, enhance and manage relationships. We also facilitate events where men meet in person and collaborate to socialize and meet other wingmen and wingwomen,  go out during the day and get involved in events where they can initiate conversations and establish relationships with women, and/or go out and enjoy the socialthe nightlife in Washington, DC and Miami.

We also host educational events in Washington, DC,  Baltimore and Miami. We host these events through coordinating with local Dating Coaches and Nationally known Speakers.  Our list of speakers has included Brad P, DJ Fuji, Nick Quick, Vince Kelvin, Psych, Adam Lyons, Badboy, James Marshall, Speer, QuickKill, Brother James, Cuisine and many more. In addition, we have a forum where members review pickup artist products and dating services.

Join Us!

Wherever you are at in your life with women, there is a place for you here. Sign up for free to join the Attraction Vault and participate in our daily discussions and forums.