Welcome to the Leading East Coast Dating and Social Life Mastery Community for men.  This site is dedicated to improving the lives of individuals who are looking to  better their dating lives and master their social surroundings.

We provide social events, a private forum with over 1000 members, and informational posts to help you become the man you desire.

Wonder why you are getting the same results week after week?

I was thinking to myself today regarding what really needs to happen for someone to get good at dating.  What do you think it is?

When you go out and get the same results is it your fault or theirs?

Take, for example, my friend ‘Mary,’ she goes out all of the time and complains that no one approaches her.  She can’t understand why.   Given Mary is a rather attractive woman and has a lot going for her.  Guys should be falling over her, but they are not.

I’ve gone out with her, and know exactly why she doesn’t get approached.  She’ll go sit down in the farthest corner in a booth where no one can see her.   When she walks around, her head is down, arms are crossed and gives off the vibe that she can’t be dealt with. More»

If you haven’t noticed, there is a ton of contradictory advice floating around the internet and pick-up forums. Aspiring PUAs have to know what advice to take and what not to take. One of the things that separates the guys that get good from the guys that never get good is the way they take advice. In fact, I believe the level of a person’s development can be gauged directly by how they take advice. Taking and using advice is more like an art than a science.

The wrong way to take advice

Many people – and we’re talking about PUAs here – do this when they take advice. They read a new article about how to do something – a new technique, opener, etc. Then they get really excited about it and run to the mall or bar to try it out. Then guess what? It doesn’t work. They get discouraged and give up on that tactic, and wait until a better one comes along. They keep looking for the one trick or system that will get them to the next level. It is a never ending futile quest.

More»

I am hater of excuses.  I hate them with a passion.  And I think you should hate them too.  They inhibit us from expressing ourselves.   They inhibit us from taking a chance.  They keep us from seeking opportunities.  They keep us from our fullest potential.

Let’s take the top ten excuses for not approaching women off the table, right here, right now, and vow never, ever to utter these words again. 

More»

Setting goals is an effective method of achieving success in life, whether it be short-term or over the long-term. There are 5 key aspects to creating goals:

1. Be specific

Write down goals in specific detail so you can clearly see what you plan to attain and how to achieve it. State exactly what you want and how you plan to get the results you seek, such as who can help and what training you may require.

a. What? What do you want to accomplish (short & long term)?
b. Where? Identify locations & venues you will do the activities at. 
c. When? Establish time frames for short & long term goals. What is your target date?
d. Who? Who can help you reach your goals? Do you seek mentorship, expert advice, or wings to help you in field?

More»

A large part of success with women is a firm belief that you can and will get what you want. I’ve been asked by guys, how do I get that strong frame of mind where I just know and expect that a woman’s going to be attracted to me and wants to have sex with me? If you have had positive experiences with women, then it would be easy to say that your present success is built upon your past success. How do I get those successes so I can then be confident.

It is true, but not necessarily true that confidence comes from past experience. Past experiences provide evidence and imagery to guide your mind, but they are not necessary per se. Almost everyone who is now very successful at something was once not successful. In fact many of these people who are successful keep trying new things and often hit set backs along the way.

More»

Never be robotic. Always be strategic. Like a good football coach, constantly think several plays ahead. That starts with preparation for the date itself. Have a game plan in mind w/your transition points and minimal escalation targets outlined. Of course, you’ve set favorable logistics, meeting at your place, her place or close by. From there, realize in advance that you need to get her from point A to points B, C, D and E.

It’s hard to lead if you don’t know where you’re going. Yes, it’s very important to be micro-focused and in the moment, but always be aware of the big picture before the night slips away. So if you need to move her from the venue to your place, seed the ASD in advance. And if at all possible, have her meet at your place first with minimal kino and drinks to establish comfort/familiarity, making it far easier to pull her later in the evening. If already at your place, know how you’re going to fractionate and escalate. Perhaps you’ll start off by exciting her w/a game of pool. Kino escalate w/some dancing. Then cuddle together w/a movie, under a blanket, and maybe on the floor or bed. From there, it’s usually very “on”. Add a sensual massage, if needed. Figure out your best closing move and build toward it during the course of the evening. BUT constantly calibrate and always be ready to change direction on the fly.
More»

One thing I have run across over the years as webmaster and moderator for Attraction Vault is that many guys use the notion that they have “standards” as an excuse to hide their fears. This isn’t to say that you should settle and be with someone who you are not attracted to. However I have noticed that sometimes the same guys who say they have “standards” aren’t even talking to any women at all. This reminds me of a great quote by Timothy Ferris, author of the Four Hour Work Week.

Recently, I’ve been spending time thinking and speaking about taking action.  As a consultant, my day job requires that I guide clients into take bold, decisive action with their businesses.  If you are a small business, your number one focus with marketing is to get noticed and most of the time that means taking bold moves that may be uncomfortable.  At night, I guide my clients at Professional Pickup and help those that I can at The Attraction Vault forums to take decisive action, and get noticed. 

The principles are all the same. 

We live in a world full of choices.   Too many choices and never enough time to scrutinize them all.  Our choices, whether this product or that service, this friend or another, this mate or that one, we all are searching or hoping to make the right choice at the right time. 

More»

One question I have been asked is how do I create the frame of mind that makes meeting and rapidly sexually escalating with women something that just comes naturally?  Here are a few key points about the kinds of beliefs and understandings that once internalized will provide you with the frame of mind to support your behavior so that it comes naturally and intuitively in the moment.

 You are valuable, worthy and desirable

 A key first step to having empowering interactions with women is building the right states of mind and beliefs about yourself.  The core underlying belief must be this: you are desirable and women want to be with you.  This does not mean you are better than the woman you desire by comparison. This does not mean that you there is not room for you to continue to grow and develop as a person to become your best self. Nor does it mean that you shouldn’t admit when you are in the wrong.  Nor does it mean you are entitled.  It is about confidence and certainty in your value as a person. This belief sets you up to become a happy, confident person.

More»